FAQs

A parent coach supports parents to better understand their child, what their child needs from them and how to best deliver that. Parent coaches can also work with parents on the triggers and issues that derail them from being the parent their child needs.

Parent coaching is focused on the parent-child relationship, while therapy often focuses on the many relationships in the client’s life. Parent coaching is here and now focused while therapy might spend quite a bit of time focusing on the past. Parent coaching is generally short-term (6-10 sessions, with follow-up as needed) while therapy can last many months to many years.

Dr. Gordon Neufeld, a clinical psychologist, is regarded worldwide as one of the foremost authorities on child and adolescent development. Dr. Neufeld is a teacher, an international speaker, a bestselling author (Hold On To Your Kids) and the leading modern interpreter of developmental theory, an approach which explores how growth and maturation occur and how humans can reach their full potential.

The Neufeld Institute is a non-profit educational institution whose mission is to educate parents, teachers and other caregivers about the Neufeld Paradigm, a comprehensive evidence-based model for the unfolding of human potential. Through lectures, conferences, books, videos and over 25 classes, the Neufeld Institute aims to provide parents with the insight needed to become the parent their child needs.

Peer orientation is when kids are looking to their peers as the primary place to get attachment needs met. Peer oriented kids look to peers for their cues on how to act, what their values should be and what their worth is.

Expressive play is happening when what is inside is coming out, such as when a child writes, dances, plays music, does theater, makes art or constructs things. As opposed to play for entertainment, where something from the outside is taken in (such as watching a movie or playing a video game), in expressive play what is inside moves outward. Read more about it here.

Attachment relationships always organize themselves hierarchically, with one person in the role of provider and the other person in the role of receiver. For a parent-child relationship (no matter the age of the child) to work as intended, the parent must always be in the role of generous provider and the child (or teen or adult child) must be in the role of receiver. When the alpha-dependent relationship becomes inverted and a child is in the alpha position, they can present as bossy, demanding, controlling and fragile and all sorts of emotional and behavioral issues can result.

Whenever vulnerable feelings are too much to bear, defenses go up. This ensures our ability to survive and function in stressful situations. However, when defenses get stuck in the “on” position - when there is not enough felt safety for them to soften back and for vulnerable feelings to be experienced - a whole host of issues can materialize. These can include problems with aggression, rigidity, addiction, anxiety, sleep and more. Read more about it here.